“What’s your favorite color?”

“What’s your favorite food?”

“What’s your favorite place to go?”

They arise at random times and in rapid succession. Each question is accompanied with a gleam in her eye and a mischievous smile, like she is trying to figure me out, put the puzzle together.

“Green”

“Spaghetti”

“The Beach!”

She giggles as she pauses. Delighted in the process of learning about me and getting to know her mama better. Most of the time I allow her to follow me around the house and keep asking the questions, they get more outlandish as her little game continues, or I settle her into the crook of my arm, I take deep breaths, filling my lungs with the way she smells, the last remnants of little girl.

My favorite part of this exercise is yet to come.

I let her lose momentum, the pauses get longer and sometimes the questions are repeated, and then I turn the tables, and watch her face.

“Sister, what is YOUR favorite color?”

Her smile gets bashful, she holds my gaze in those deep and bright blue eyes, and thinks…”Blue, like daddy’s favorite color.”

“What is YOUR favorite food”

As my questions follow in the same pattern, she begins to revel in the idea that I am interested in her, I want to know her, hear her heart, and learn about her. It’s her turn and it’s hard to describe how tangible her satisfaction is. Her twinkling eyes dance as she realizes I am paying attention and deem her worthy of my time and my effort to find her heart. She situates herself to face me. Accepting the gift I am giving her, she is confident in herself. Her hearts desire, its beat ringing in-sync with mine and yours, is to be known. To be understood. To be seen, heard. To experience someone seeking her out, rejoicing in her uniqueness and details. Her favorites, they matter. The way she sees her world, it’s important and I value it.

Our daughter finds great joy in knowing her family, in knowing me. I love watching her value people, at six years old, she pay attention. She listens, she show compassion and she embodies the heart of Jesus. She just wants to have conversations with us, to talk about things that are important to us. And she freely gives herself, allowing those of us who might take the time, to know her.

The idea of someone not valuing her or deciding she isn’t worth knowing is heartbreaking, even in thought. Her open and vulnerable heart will not always be taken care of properly, she will be hurt, she will be misunderstood. After all we live in a broken world with broken people. How do I convince her it’s worth persevering? How do I teach her not to shut herself off, withdraw? What should she do with the wounds that are bound to come, the pain?

I will point her to the one person that does know her, and sees her, and understands her. I will walk her to Jesus and explain He is in fact the ONLY love that will never fail, the ONLY companion that will never disappoint and the ONLY safe place that will protect and guard. He is always asking, always interested, and never tires. His love is always protecting and shielding, He will heal. From the safety of His wings she can bravely risk being known. His truth proclaims that we are hidden in Him, we can’t be snatched from His hands!

She has reminded me and encouraged my heart to recognize my deep need to be known, perceived and understood, and to continue to take that deep need to the God who created me. The one who knit me together and is overwhelmed with how incredibly intricate and wonderful I am. My creator, my redeemer and my rescuer, my savior, my ransom, and my life…He knows. He sees and He upholds, protects and values. What a Great God, and what an incredible gift He has given, He gifts us the honor and privilege of being known…if we accept it.

He wants to know us, yes, but He, too, wants to be known. His heart is reflected in ours as we desire to be sought after. The same hands that molded and fashioned her heart and mine are held out to us, inviting us to seek Him, find Him and experience Him. And when we do, we will find that His favorites..?

..are us! 🙂